Life Is But A Drink

Happy Friday!

It’s been one of those weeks.  Hectic.  Exhausting.  Relentless.  I’m looking forward to the weekend in the hope that it involves at least a small amount of downtime and a little less hectic-ness, exhaustion, and relentless-ness.  We’ll see.

***

My daughter continues to crack me up with her slightly-off interpretations of words.  (See here and here for some earlier examples.)  Here are a few of her latest ones that are making me giggle:

“On Perfect” = “On Purpose”

For example:

“Eco crashed into me.”

“I’m sorry, honey, but I think it was on accident.”

“No it wasn’t.  It was on perfect.”

Huh?

“Today Tomorrow” = “Later Today” 

For example:

“Honey, we can’t play with your toys right now.  We’ll play with them later.”

“OK.  But, not tomorrow, Mom.  Can we play with them today tomorrow?”

Huh?

“Firework” = “Fire Drill”

“Mom, guess what?  Today at preschool we had a firework?”

“Huh?”

“We lined up and followed our teacher outside to the playground to get away from the fire.  But it wasn’t a real fire.  It was just a firework.”

Huh?

***

I snapped this photo of my dog earlier this week.

That is him, lying on his bed in the corner of our bedroom, with one of our window curtains over his head. The kids weren’t awake yet, so I know they didn’t stage it.  He just did this on his own.  I’m taking this as evidence that he just can’t take it anymore.  I’m not sure what “it” is, but it’s obviously serious.

 ***

My kids are now addicted to the Avengers.

I’m not sure how this happened, but they now spend their days pretending to be Avengers and saving various things (each other, me, our house, the dog).  They also want to watch the Avengers cartoon all the time on Netflix.

I think my daughter has a serious crush on Captain America (I kinda get that, strangely) and feels a strange affinity for Hulk (who she always refers to as Hulk Smash and tries to convince me that this is in fact his full name – like he’s Hulk P. Smash or something.  Is that true?  I don’t claim to be entirely up on my Avengers.).

***

And I want to leave you with some general words of wisdom.  Always know how to turn the water off to your house.  Because sometimes your husband will be out of town and you’ll need to know – EMERGENCY! – how to turn it off.  I learned this lesson the hard way this week.  I’ll fill you in in a few days, but let’s just say we had some unplanned excitement at our place on Monday night…

We introduced our son to the first (or fourth, I guess, since they made those other ones and OMG I just don’t get it) Star Wars last week.  He, of course, loved it.  We didn’t expect anything different. 

Surprisingly, though, our 3 year old daughter (who was essentially along for the ride on the whole introduction to Star Wars thing because I was single-parenting it that night and, well, she wants to do everything that her brother does because that’s the way it is) also really dug the movie.  She’s been talking about it non-stop.  In the car ride in the morning, she gives me a rundown of the entire movie.   But it is absolutely hilarious to listen to her recount because she’s having some difficulty with some of the terminology and names. 

So, consider this the Star Wars-centric follow up to the post I did awhile back on things my daughter says that crack me up (see here). 

“START WARS”

“DOO-DOO D 2″

“DARK VADER”

“JABBA THE HOT TUB”  (Seriously, I’m not making this stuff up….) 

SON:  Mom, does Miss Anna still have a baby in her belly?

ME:  Nope.  She had her baby a few weeks ago.

SON:  That’s great!

ME:  Yes, isn’t that wonderful?

SON: You want to know why it’s great?

ME:   You bet. Why is it great?

SON:  Because now she can drink beer and wine again.

{NOTE TO SELF:  While everything he stated is true, this is undeniable proof that you have absolutely failed as a parent.}